“I wanted so badly to sit through the Power of Purpose, but I knew with the chronic pain I’d struggled with for years it simply was not possible!” Vickie wrote.
Chronic pain and chronic illness affecting so much of the way we live are things that too many must deal with.
Even with all the advancements in immunity support and pain management, it remains an ongoing issue for so many.
I remember when my assistant told me before this particular Power of Purpose that Vickie’s husband had called to see if she could attend. And be there as much as possible, but to leave and rest as was needed, due to her chronic pain and chronic illness.
Although the program is not really designed for that, I felt in my heart that it was important for her. Because I knew the research results about lowered chronic illness and chronic pain after people discovered their purpose.
When I sent the query out several months ago for people who had experienced the Power of Purpose to share their stories … I was so glad to receive Vickie’s story, because I had never heard the rest of it.
Certainly, I’m not suggesting that you change any of your medical protocol for chronic illness or chronic pain.
But if you struggle with either or both of those, or know someone who does, I am certainly recommending finding your purpose as an important means of lowering the incidences of one or both.
I am hoping that sharing Vickie’s story this week will be an inspiration to you.
We all get tired. That tiredness can either turn into a real chronic condition or it can turn into motivation.
I get it. When you’re that tired … motivation seems like a curse word. But that’s when we all must take a long honest look inside ourselves and determine if we are truly tired enough. Because when we conclude that we are … that’s when we know it’s time for to change everything!
1. What was your trauma?
Vickie wrote: “I grew up in a home plagued with addiction.”
“My mom was a chain-smoker, and used Adderall so long that it changed her brain, and changed who she was. Plus, she was a pathological liar.”
“My dad smoked cigars, chewed tobacco, drank like a fish, and popped Adderall as well! And this apple fell way too close to their tree!”
“My whole life, I would say things like: ‘It was crazy in our house all the time, but I guess it didn’t matter … because they loved each other.’ But then one of my brothers said to me …”
“’What the hell are you talking about? They yelled at each other, swore at each other, said awful things to each other, and how many times did you ever see them hug, or even be remotely affectionate with each other’?”
“I had to laugh and admit that the answer was” … “NEVER!”
“And then he continued his interrogation… ‘And why the hell do you think we all have chronic respiratory problems? We grew up in a smoke factory’!”
“When he told me I grew up in a fairytale land view of our family, he was right! Perhaps I was underweight my whole life because their favorite punishment was sending me to bed without supper.”
“And more often than not, we got peanut butter and jelly while they enjoyed steak and baked potatoes.”
“The yelling was crazy … and the things they said to me scarred me for years!”
“But the trauma continued. In my marriage. Because I never healed what happened to me … I reenacted it on my husband.”
“He was wonderful. Patient. Loving. Believing the best in me!”
“Despite my struggle with drinking, Adderall use, yelling awful things at him, and spewing negativity … no matter what … he saw the best in me!”
“He refused to relent in praying for me, believing in me, and believing there were answers for me.”
“Like when we found out about the Power of Purpose, and he called your office to ask your assistant if you would allow me to attend and come and go as I needed.”
“By that time, I’d conquered alcohol addiction, but I was still addicted to Adderall, and in denial about it. My chronic pain doctor told me it was a nationwide pandemic and continued to mandate that I stop it.”
“Particularly when I told him how it changed my mom, and I saw the same in myself. But I kept telling myself it helped me … when really, I just needed the high.”
“I really had no idea the extent of the trauma I’d caused him, or our kids.”
“Even though I was at the end of my rope before I went to the Power of Purpose, I felt like it was a ‘last chance’ of sorts for me.”
“I wasn’t suicidal, but I was sick of being sick. I was tired of being tired. I was tired of lying about Adderall. I somehow knew that without a breakthrough, my life was over.”
“I know that all sounds dramatic, but it’s just where I was when I walked into that room.”
When we grow up in an unpredictable environment, we create our own sense of a predictable one. And when that happens, we view that chaos through the lens of the past, that we created to make life seem predictable.
Then … if we add an addictive substance to the scenario, we bury the truth even deeper, spending our days in a remorseful search for the reason why we feel that we need it. Which is yet another version of insanity.
2. What is your purpose?
“Truthfully, I don’t even think I knew what purpose meant or was when I walked in. But I’d heard others who’d talked about what it did for them in their lives.”
“And I was desperate. I knew what I should do … but couldn’t on my own.”
“I knew the lying was wrong, but I couldn’t stop.”
“No one had told me that there would be activity involved, or I might not have come. Right away, you had us up, had suspended our right to speak any words, and you had us mingling and doing various exercises with strangers.”
“I was so concerned about doing the exercises correctly that by the time that was over, I’d forgotten about my pain for a few minutes.”
Maybe there was/is something to what Jesus said, “Whoever loses their life will find it.” When we give ourselves and immerse ourselves into moments that stretch us, perhaps that’s when we get out of ourselves and experience joy? Just a thought.
“As we went along, and I learned more about what purpose was … I felt pretty sure that I was in the wrong place.”
“There was no purpose for me.”
“I came from a dysfunctional home. We were the ‘demo-picture’ in the dictionary for the world’s most dysfunctional family!”
“I had messed up my marriage and my kids, although I was a ‘fairly good’ mom and certainly never did to them what was done to me. But I could’ve been SO MUCH BETTER!”
“I’ve read the stuff you write now about the Champion within. How it’s buried beneath pain, shame, and trauma. Definitely, the Champion mom (and wife) in me was buried!”
“But then when we did the ‘movie of your life thing’, I heard you say that no one had made too many mistakes! No one had had too many awful things happen to them! Nobody had stepped across the line that left them void of purpose!”
“It was like you were talking to me and responding to what was going on in my brain.”
“Before I knew it, it was lunchtime. I’d been so intrigued with what I was hearing and doing and learning, that I’d not taken any of the breaks I’d asked for.”
“After lunch in the second writing exercise about purpose, something shifted in me. I had this deep longing to love my husband. I mean … I love him, how could I not love him? But when it came to showing it, I had no idea how to show anyone love.”
“But I longed (for the first time) to show him love.”
“Everyone was totally immersed in the writing exercise, and I quietly got up. I saw my husband look up and I’m sure he thought I was taking a pain break. He smiled at me.”
“To not look too obvious, I slipped out and used the restroom, but on the way back in, I passed by his chair, and gave him a hug from behind quietly.”
“It’s not that I never hugged him. But usually when I did, it was hugging him back, or doing so out of some sort of obligation. But this time it was different. It flowed straight from my heart.”
“I returned my chair, picked up my workbook and my pen, and glanced his way. I saw the tear, and it moved me. Deeply.”
“Little did I know when I came hoping for a breakthrough, that there would be an actual breakthrough moment in the program.”
“Yes, I did break through!”
“I broke through the walls hurt, the walls of neglect, the walls of trauma. The walls that had imprisoned me. For years.”
“Then the moment it came to writing the letter, the purpose I believed I did not have … suddenly popped into my head and my heart at the same time.”
“It was a ‘high’ that Adderall could not give me!”
“My purpose is:
“To encourage those whose lives are imprisoned by chronic pain and chronic illness to kick the walls down and live again!”
“That evening, when I was finishing my Blueprint for Success, I went back to the page that asked what I had to say YES to and what I had to say NO to in order to live free.”
“I had one item to add to each list.”
“I must say YES to allowing myself to love my husband fiercely and passionately!”
“I must say NO to Adderall.”
“Purpose changed me!”
Purpose is only found when we surrender what we cannot change. And when we trust that the healing we’ll discover will become our doorway to purpose.
Jeoffrey Benward wrote these lyrics to the chorus of a song he wrote entitled: “When Surrender Calls.”
“When surrender calls
To the child inside of you
And you finally let go …
Choices become new!
When surrender calls
From the God beyond the walls
Freedom rises … prisons fall!
When surrender calls!”
3. What difference has it made in your life?
“I’d come into the nutritional company that sponsored you about a year prior to the Power of Purpose, because my husband read some research about how the products helped manage chronic pain and illness.”
“I’d been on the products for about a year, and they did help some.”
“But the difference after finding my purpose was astounding!”
“The difference in my struggle with pain made me wonder (at first) if it could possibly last.”
“There was still a journey. But within 18 months, I was off all prescription pain, meds, and only using naproxen occasionally.”
“Maybe the greatest eye-opener was when I walked into my internal medicine specialist’s office, who all knew me well. And was greeted with: ‘Where have you been? We haven’t seen you in ages’!”
“They were right! My ongoing struggle with colds, bronchitis, allergies, sinus infections, flu … had practically disappeared.”
“Perhaps the greatest thing that has occurred has been in my marriage.”
“We recently celebrated our 25th anniversary, and my husband was saying how much he’d enjoyed our new way of living. And how grateful he was.”
“I was telling him how sorry I was that I’d made it so difficult, because I just didn’t realize (and then wasn’t willing to work through) my trauma.”
“And I apologized again sincerely for how I’d played it out on him.”
“He assured me that he knew I was sorry and that I never needed to apologize again.”
“He added: ‘And if we had to go through all of that again with it being 10 times worse, it would be worth it to have what we have now’!”
“What difference has it made?”
“I’m alive.”
“I help people with chronic pain and chronic illness.”
“I have the marriage of my dreams.”
“What more could I possibly ask for? I am grateful!”
“What would I say to your audience?”
“Find your purpose.
Your life will change.
In an amazing way.
Never stop searching.
Until you find it.
Then you will know what it’s like to truly live!”
Find your purpose!
Then do what you know to do … daily.
And what you’ll know is, you were meant for this purpose!
Finding purpose lowers chronic pain.
Finding purpose lowers chronic illness.
Finding purpose saves lives.
Finding purpose saves marriages.
Finding purpose saves families.
What more reason should we need to find our purpose?
My hopes and prayers are … you will find yours!
And live it with great passion.
Because your purpose can change lives!
For more info on the Power of Purpose, click here:
