(Before we jump in, I’d like to share a heart with you for a moment. I wasn’t born this eternal optimist I’ve grown to become personally or professionally. I too had to dig to revive and resurrect the childlike wonder meant to Champion my life and my dreams.
Like I encourage you to do, I also had to create my own soul resurrecting ‘tipping point’ and reach deep within to revive the wonder God wanted me, and all of us, to live and dream by. My wonder was stolen and buried in me. And until my work with Dr. John Bradshaw, I had no idea what was missing and that there was something to resurrect.
And just like some of you, as a child, I was caged in an imaginary jail of shame, fear, and doubt. But a soul-jail none the less, created by someone else’s sins … and the anger born from their unrealized expectations. But just like I ask you to do, I chose to find my Champion within and not live by the death sentence of ‘rightful/deserved’ resentments and loss.
But as I worked, like I encourage you to work; I was able to dig and dig and dig till I found that broken little me…meant to become the expressive Champion of my uniqueness and gifts. When I did, I took her by the hand and told her, “Time to end this darkness…time for us to find and be our Champion!” That was…my Champion life tipping point!
You too can find your Champion life tipping point! And, I’m called and equipped to help you make that happen …and… together … WE CAN!)
“I am 100% committed! Although, I’m not sure what to do next. We’re in agreement on one thing…we will not let the downturn in the economy or the struggles it’s caused our marriage, to shut us down! Without one doubt I know this is what we are meant to do. We just need a little…well…maybe a boat load of guidance!”
I knew from his opening words and the agreement of his wife, that I was working with a couple who were truly Champions!
One of the many things I love about champions is their irrefutable belief that all things are possible.
Like many Champions, they were looking for their tipping point! A tipping point for their marriage and in their business.
Malcolm Gladwell made “The Tipping Point” almost a household word with his book, though the concept was centuries old. The definition of “tipping point” that I appreciate the most is:
‘The critical point in a situation, process, or system beyond which a significant and often unstoppable effect or change takes place.’
I like to think of it as what occurs on the Texas Giant Coaster at Six Flags or on the TRON at Disney World…you get on, strapped in…and as you’re almost lying on your back climbing that first hill the click…click…click starts…and then slows and finally…that pause at the summit. Your heart racing…then for maybe 1 to 2 seconds the collective silence, turns into a train full of screaming adrenaline junkies as the coaster cars cascade over that ‘Tipping Point’… the ‘real reason’ anyone rides a roller-coaster! And you find yourself suddenly screaming, “Why did I say I’d do this?!” as your grandkids laugh themselves into ecstasy!
Tipping points are magical. Whether on a roller coaster, in your marriage, or in your business.
In the closing words of his book ‘The Tipping Point’ Malcolm Gladwell says:
“Look at your world around you. It may seem an implacable place. It is not. With the slightest push-in just the right place-it can be tipped.”
This week I would like to share with you what I shared with this couple. What Champions do consistently to hit their desired tipping points.
1. Champions do the uncomfortable stuff and the hard things.
I rolled up my sleeves, buckled us all in for the click-click-click that gets us to the tipping point: “Let’s get right down to it! What do you need to do that’s uncomfortable in your marriage and in your business, and what hard things are you putting off in both?”
Without skipping a beat, they both responded:
She said, “For the uncomfortable stuff in the marriage, I need to tell him when I’m scared instead of hoping he’ll notice. For the business, I need to do last year’s taxes (that’s hard) so we can work on the grant. (That’s uncomfortable).”
She paused for a moment and continued.
“As for the hard stuff in our marriage? I need to be more empathetic and compassionate when he needs me to do his morning responsibilities with the kids after pulling an all-night-er.”
He responded with equal authenticity.
“As for the uncomfortable stuff in the business, I need to spend additional time with our business coach, even though it seems we can’t afford it. For the marriage, I need to be more careful to carve out the time for our intimate communication daily. After all, what difference would it make if we hit the tipping point and we couldn’t enjoy vacations together? I need to re-prioritize my time.”
“For the hard things, in our marriage, I simply must step up my game because there’s a huge inequity in the amount of time and effort, she invests in the business, compared to what I invest in the business. Plus, she has a 20 hour a week j-o-b to keep the mortgage paid.”
I waited as he carefully crafted these heartfelt responses which were so respectful.
“I mean I work hard, but I can get wrapped up in social media and a few games I play quickly. As for the business? The hard thing that I need to do immediately is go back and update our supporters, even though it’s not a great report yet. They need to hear from me.”
Champions know that every great leader from Brené Brown to Tony Robbins, from John Maxwell to TD Jakes and from Dr. Andrew Huberman to Oprah, concurs that your greatness does not come to life in your comfort zone. They all know it’s in addressing the hard things where tipping points are mastered.
What do you need to do that’s uncomfortable?
What do you do need to do that’s hard?
What now to hit that tipping point?
What areas of your life need it?
Whether it be in
DO the uncomfortable things!
DO the hard things!
Then get ready to see life begin to tip! Can you hear it?
Click-click-click (The sounds of the up-clicks to your summit are slow and daunting!)
2. Champions take non-negotiable action every day.
I shared with my couple that they needed to identify and take non-negotiable actions daily.
Whatever actions will make you the best version of you to do whatever you need to do that will further the tipping point, in those areas of your life you want and need. For them it was in their marriage and in their business.
I recommend that people have 7 to 10 of these set for daily action. They can change and be reevaluated every week or month. As long as they move things forward, they’re great action items! I like to see people have one personal, on relational, and one other focused on where ‘they’ need the tipping point.
I invited the husband to list off a few. After a moment of thought, he began his contemplated list:
- Reading his power word and proclamation aloud first thing every morning.
- Setting his alarm early enough to have a few minutes of quality time with his wife before the organized chaos began daily.
- Spending a few minutes in prayer and meditation upon arrival at his office.
- Choosing 3 things to do to connect with key clients.
He agreed to complete his list of 10 things before retiring that evening.
- Reading my power proclamation aloud before leaving the house.
- Making mornings fun for the kids.
- Devoting 3 to 5 minutes in the morning to speak words of inspiration into my husband.
- Checking in on our metrics to see where I can best spend my efforts on the business after my morning at my j-o-b.
I loved it that the beginning of their lists included self-care, connection, inspiration, and time for one another.
What non-negotiable things do you need to have on your daily action list?
They move marriages, finances, businesses, personal goals, and dreams forward very quickly!
Click-click-click (they’re sounding off a little slower as we climb)!
3. Champions operate from a place of faith and empowering beliefs.
I was impressed that my couple had clearly demonstrated this as part of their lives.
In their opening comments, they were transparent about the challenges, but also demonstrated faith and empowering beliefs.
“I know you believe! I could hear it from the beginning of your first session! However, we can never do too much to build our faith and empower our beliefs. To do that, let me ask each of you what disempowering beliefs might be creeping in? About your marriage? About your business?”
She immediately blurted out, “I’m afraid getting traction in our online business is taking too long, and maybe we should reconsider?”
I could see from the tears forming in her eyes, she was truly struggling with that. Then I looked at him and he shared this.
“That if she gives up on this, I’ll never be able to do it by myself. Not to mention that I’ve taken my frustrations out on her instead of talking about them.”
I smiled and nodded, because I so appreciated their ability to share something we could build long. And their vulnerability was priceless.
Most champions know how to address the disempowering beliefs once they are extracted. If you are not familiar, you might want to check this blog: https://bit.ly/DisempoweringMessages.
(Summary of blog link: Identify disempowering messages, scramble them, create empowering messages, make them even more empowering, install them on your hard drive of your brain!)
“So”, I said. “Let’s turbocharge those into empowering beliefs!”
Since they’d done it many times before, after a moment of contemplation they both delivered amazing empowering beliefs.
Hers: “When it seems like it’s taking too long, that’s a great sign that we’re near the tipping point!”
“BRAVO,” I affirmed!
His: “Thank God, I couldn’t do it without her, that’s what makes this our dream. I’ll spend time daily, inspiring and encouraging her because she’s the heart and soul of the business! I will only speak words of life to her!”
We stomped the old beliefs into the ground and installed the new beliefs deep in their hearts and minds.
What about you? How do you need to build your face and/or deal with any disempowering beliefs?
“The truth is that we all have unlimited potential. Success starts with this belief. When we deeply believe that we are capable and deserving of success, we’re able to tap into that potential. This drives greater action, which in turn drives greater results. That reinforces our belief in ourselves, and the cycle begins again – even stronger. Anyone can tap into this cycle of success. It starts with identifying your limiting beliefs.”
Click…click…click…that silence pause… then the tipping point!
YOU ARE THERE!
We worked together in several sessions and on the third visit they’d reached a tipping point, once again, in their marriage. Which oh by the way, spilled over into their business.
A few months later, their business hit the tipping point.
One thing we know for sure, if you can inspire a tipping point in one area of your life, it’s almost contagious!
I know you are a Champion.
Do the uncomfortable stuff. CLICK ONE!
Do the hard things. CLICK TWO!
Take your non-negotiable, action steps daily. CLICK THREE!
“In the end, Tipping Points are a reaffirmation of the potential for change and the power of intelligent action. Look at the world around you. It may seem like an immovable, implacable place. It is not. With the slightest push—in just the right place—it can be tipped.”
Identify and pump up ANY disempowering beliefs…you’re at the PAUSE…SILENCE…THEN…You’re at your…SUMMIT of faith, focus, intention, grit…your TIPPING POINT!
“Truly I tell you, if you have intentional faith and focus as small as a mustard seed, you can see and say to your mountain, ‘Move! …And it will move! Nothing will be impossible for you.”