YES! I’m opening a SPA … but before we get there … let me share my passion and my vision!
“Do you really think you can make a significant difference in the amount of people struggling with trauma? I mean trauma is everywhere! It’s overwhelming, and I just don’t want you to be disappointed.”
I know that my colleague was sincere in the effort to make sure I didn’t end up disappointed about the thing I’m most passionate about…
And I greatly appreciated his care about my heart…
But I think my response caught him by surprise.
“Have you ever heard the story about the little boy who was walking on the seashore, surrounded by hundreds and thousands of starfish that had washed up on the shore?”
My colleague looked at me inquisitively, which indicated to me he had not heard the story.
I continued: “He was walking along the seashore, picking up one starfish at a time and throwing it back in the water. An older man approached him, and said that he could not possibly save all the starfish …”
“The little boy never missed a beat while he responded… ‘I can save this one … and this one … and this one,” he proclaimed as he continued, throwing the starfish back in the water!
My colleague shook his head with a grin, and responded: “So I’m the old man and you’re the boy saving one person after another from trauma that’s held them down …”
With an even larger grin, I reported: “Well, I’m not a boy, but I can save this one… and this one… and this one,” As I pointed to files on my desk.
“But this year, I am intensifying my effort, and that’s why I asked to speak to you. Because if we all work together, we can reach even more people!”
“I should have known that you would have an advanced plan for the year to come! And whatever I can do to help, I am ALL IN!” He responded in a way that warmed my heart.
May I invite you into my world … to hear what I’m doing?
And to see if there’s any way you’d like to join me in my mission?
Here are the things inspiring me for the coming year, and I hope you will follow the journey with me, even if it’s simply to cheer me on from time to time!
Why am I so passionate about this? I’m so glad you asked!
1. The numbers of people struggling with trauma are staggering!
Let me start with the definition of trauma:
“Any experience that has affected us in any way that diminishes who we are, dullens our gifts and talents, and makes life more difficult than it would have otherwise been.”
The truth is … most of us have experienced some level of trauma in our lives. It includes everything from:
- Financial loss to bankruptcy
- Unexpected layoffs to getting fired
- Breakups to divorce
- Loss of a pet to loss of a dear friend
- Covid to cancer
- Disrespect to devastation
- Insult to injury
- Disturbing news to crushing news
- Mishap to serious accident
- Bombing a test to flunking out
- Being blamed to betrayal
No matter who is at fault …
No matter how, or why it occurred …
Trauma is trauma, and people become their trauma.
(From my friend in AA recovery … “AA meetings are 1 hour long… never less, never more. I’ve sat in many now, and one thing rings true as people share. The ones that are there, who stay the course, all understand and come to realize drinking is not the issue. It’s the endless list of dark secrets rooted in regret, pain, anger, shame, resentment you name it… that they HAD to medicate into powerlessness. The difference between those who heal and those who leave and never heal… you ask? Staying the course until you hear in those who share your story, your pain, your shame, your loneliness. Their trauma becomes your mirror, and you finally see why you became a drunk. It’s then you face a path of surrender of all you know, for a path of uncharted trust, and giving up the one thing you’ve known and never found and can never find-YOU!)
To give you a perspective:
- The #1 cause of death between the ages of 1 and 46 is something trauma related.
- The cost of trauma related care costs the US $4.2 trillion annually
- About 45% of men will be exposed to trauma at least once in their life
- More than 50% – 65% of women will be exposed to at least one traumatic event in their lifetime
- Now we know that generational trauma exponentially increases the numbers of those with traumatic experiences
When I look at the massive negative impact of trauma on lives, I am deeply moved to make a difference. It’s not just a little thing I enjoy. I believe it’s my calling and purpose.
I will continue to reach this one … and this one … and this one … Whoever is in front of me.
But I will also do all I can to send the call out to anyone who desires to help and influence others to their best selves, and best lives to join me! The numbers are increasing, but there’s plenty of room for YOU! WE NEED YOU! Those with trauma need YOU!
But then I encountered something else I am passionate about!
2. The impact of working with trauma can be arduous
From the beginning of my career, although I did not know to call it ‘trauma’… I have had a heart for those who struggle with it or suffer through it.
That will never change, and it’s the reason I became aware of the challenges of those who help with trauma.
We’ve known for years that first responders need help dealing with the traumatic things that they encounter on a regular basis. I have always been and will continue to be a great supporter in that!
But what we were not considering is the ‘secondhand trauma’ that those who help others through trauma experience.
We know now that over 35% of first responders are diagnosed with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). An additional 30%+ seek some sort of help to deal with what they’ve seen/experienced.
We know the numbers of caregivers (therapists, counselors, coaches, clergy, etc.) are even greater when it comes to the effect trauma has on them.
Studies report that the “high emotional burden” can negatively impact the immune system, cause anxiety and/or depression, and lead to early burn out. Not to mention higher success rates than any other profession at this time.
Some refer to it as “compassion fatigue.” Others call it “secondary traumatic stress disorder.”
Whatever you call it, it takes a toll, and one that is not often recognized.
It occurs often … whether it is a friend or a loved one helping us through a devastating loss, or a professional counseling us.
As I’ve begun to rally other professionals, people with hearts to help others, coaches, counselors, and others … to catch the vision of helping people with trauma… I also saw the lack of resources for those who were there serving those with trauma.
I know what it’s like …
I have sat with a parent who has just lost their child. To come away feeling brokenhearted.
I know what it’s like to sit with someone I have helped to rescue from sex trafficking and hear the heinous stories of abuse. And come away feeling sick.
I know what it’s like to see a dad announce divorce to his children and see them crumble to the floor in tears. While he stared as if they were overreacting.
And come away heartbroken for kids, whose lives will be impacted forever.
Thankfully, because of my faith, I know and find it a beautiful moment to pray and find peace.
Yet at times, having someone to listen, to encourage, to just walk beside me is priceless.
Because of confidentiality, we can never share intimate details about any of our cases with anyone else.
But, for example, one of my Executive Trauma Coaches, Lisa, is a dear friend of mine. Occasionally, when I am trauma weary, I ask her to go on a walk. I don’t have to tell her any details, all I have to say is: “I sat and watched brokenhearted children cry over an unnecessary divorce” …
Sometimes she’s quiet and walks beside me. Sometimes she takes my hand. Sometimes she speaks word of honor over me that I was there for those kids.
She’s a great blessing in my life, and somehow just knows what to do or say. But many who work with victims of trauma do not have a Lisa in their lives.
Because I have been rallying helpers, healers, therapist, counselors, teachers, pastors, life coaches, executives … Anyone who desires to help others… I knew that I needed to make sure they had a place to go. That we were supporting them, so that they did not drop out of the journey.
They deserve a place to go to get their needs met. To convene with others who are on a similar path. To have a place to get refueled. Refreshed. Re-energized. So …
3. I am opening a SPA!
Can you believe it? And I’m so excited!
No, it’s not a place or a destination with an address.
But … It’s:
A place with a whirlpool for the weary hearted.
A place with a sauna for a sad and soul.
A place with massage for melted down spirits.
A place with yoga for those yearning peace.
May I tell you about it?
It’s the Coaches SPA (Summit for Partnership & Accountability)
C-SPA will be …
A community place for passionate caring people like you, where you’ll get…
- Basic training…
- Ongoing case consultation…
- Questions answered…
- Live demonstrations by me to learn “hands on”…
- Sessions to ‘ask me anything’… face to face
- Other stellar and devoted Coaches to network with and get support…
- A safe place to relax, grow, and pour your heart out…
I’m officially kicking off our first SPA gathering on Sunday, January 14, 2024.
I will save you 5 to 7 years of graduate school (at over $200k) to equip you with this incredible/life-changing experience for my members.
So, until January 11, 2024, if you’re a Coach, or mentor, or someone with a heart to help others, and you want to master the art of transformation, I’d like to invite you to join me on this journey.
I’m personally inviting you to become a Founding Member of my Coaches SPA (Summit for Accountability & Partnership).
Can I count on you? I know I can because this goes out to my faithful supporters.
How can you help? Well, I can think of a few ways:
- Send this to anyone you know that has a role in helping people through difficulty (which are likely a farm of trauma).
- Join me if you’re one of the wonderful healers that I have had the opportunity to work with! (Or even if I’ve never met you!)
- Finally, would you keep me in your thoughts and prayers?
- And maybe even send me an occasional word of encouragement as I take on this massive objective with passion?
I need you! Because this dream is bigger than I am.
Am I afraid? YES! But if I reach just this one … then this one … then this one … It is a WIN!
I’m ready for the journey!
I’ve taken on the challenge because of great quotes like this:
“If your dreams don’t scare you, they are too small.” Richard Branson
“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” Elanor Roosevelt
“Ask yourself, ‘How long am I going to work to make my dreams come true?’ I suggest you answer, ‘As long as it takes’.”
It will take as long as it takes, but together … we can reach MORE of those affected by trauma SOONER!
To become their best selves.
To live their best lives!
An ABUNDANT LIFE!
If you’d like to check the SPA out, you can get more info by clicking here: